Never, Ever, EVER Give Up

Until six months ago, I knew I was one of the "lucky ones". There was always a parking space for me, I always got the beautiful girl, my timing was impeccable, I succeeded at pretty much everything I tried, I waltzed from one great job to another, then started my own business, and before long grew a big business - my life was truly blessed. And then it all went horribly wrong.

If you haven't read the earlier posts on this blog, then now is the time to do so. They will tell you that the last six months have been hell for me, and hell for my family. There isn't too much detail, but I can tell you that having become so used to everything going right, I was becoming quite used to it all going very badly wrong. This post isn't looking for any pity, so please don't feel any - but it is about letting out some of the feelings I have suppressed these last few months, and I hope I can draw on the experience to benefit both you and I.

Boy, did I fall fast and hard. From superstar to nobody, from shining example to:

• Avoiding people and phone calls chasing money
• Raiding a piggy bank for food
• Borrowing money from relatives
• Putting all kinds of things up for sale
• Playing the lottery for the first time
• Lying to friends when we couldn't afford to go out with them

There have been times when I have actually wept tears of anger and frustration - my problems were not of my making, it was the recession, and more importantly the banks' reaction to it that caused the problems.

I was probably at my lowest ebb at Christmas - I could see other people happily preparing for the holidays and knew for us it would be a tough one. I just couldn't see a way we could deal with the debt, and for the first time in my life, I didn't have a plan.

That was the point at which I should have given up. The sensible thing would have been to declare bankruptcy and roll over - we would have lost everything we had worked for, but we could have started again with a clean slate and no debt. But I couldn't do it - I couldn't put a dozen people out of jobs, I couldn't let suppliers who have become friends go without payments they had earned, I, no we, just had to find a way forward.

And we did. We finally persuaded the banks to start supporting us again, and today we paid most people off, and we'll get to the rest over the next few days. We've also got a buyer for something we've been trying to sell for ages, and we've even booked a viewing on our other house for tomorrow with someone who seems keen - the timing of that is great, because a week ago we would have accepted practically anything for it, now the pressure is off, we can afford to hold out for a decent price.

It seems my luck has changed, but so have I. I have learned a little humility and I have learned to take much less for granted.

One thing that did help sustain me through all this, was my network of blogging friends, and I thank all of you for taking the time to read this blog, to support me, to cajole me and for making me feel I was making some kind of worthwhile contribution.

The lesson for me has been that this is a great community, and I have vowed that I will continue to be part of it, and will always try to give as much as I can to the community, in any way I can.

The lesson for you is to never, ever, EVER give up.